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What It’s Like To Be A BBW

I refer to myself as a BBW — Big, Beautiful Woman. I grew up in a small town. Dating was difficult and dates were sparse. Being a big, curvy girl, I was never really insecure, but was understandably shy about dating. I was involved with church and other activities back then, so I didn’t really think much about dating. Then I moved away and all of that changed.

When I reached my early twenties, I think I finally figured it out — that there were men who were also attracted to bigger girls. A friend of mine pointed out on Yahoo! that there was a BBW chat room, so I joined. I got on that and started talking to a number of people. To my surprise, there was an entire community! There were dating sites, like bbw dating, that are specifically designed for large people who are looking for other large people to date and form long, lasting relationships. They even have parties, like a big dance with a buffet and a DJ. It’s not really meant to be about hooking up. It’s about meeting new people and hanging out.

In my experience, I think it’s harder for most BBW women to go to the bars and flirt with a guy because we don’t know if the guy is interested or not. I don’t really have that problem, because if he’s not interested, then that’s his problem. I’m not afraid to flirt with somebody. I go out dancing every weekend and so I’ve never had problems at the bar. That’s not the case for all BBW women, unfortunately.

With bbw dating sites, it’s made it a lot easier for me to meet men who are looking for the same thing as me. I also think that it’s easier to say, “This is what I am interested in so I am going to message this guy,” and the same thing goes for men who are interested in and looking for BBW women. If that’s the body type they’re interested in, online bbw dating makes that a lot easier. When a guy sends a big girl at the bar a drink, she might think: “Is he making fun of me or did he send it on a bet?” With online dating, they’re not going to message you unless they’re interested.

I am now in my thirties and I normally only date fairly fit guys. My type preference is “fit with a good job”. I didn’t decide to date fit guys, it’s just who I’m attracted to. I have plenty of male friends that are not attracted to big girls; they only date skinny girls. And I don’t judge them for that because, like I said, I’m only attracted to a certain type, as well.

There is fetishism in the BBW community, as well, so I make it very clear when I start talking to somebody online that if they’re not attracted to all body types, I won’t date them. This is important to me because I have lost 100 pounds in the past. If I ever lost more, I wouldn’t want somebody to not be attracted to me and I’ve heard stories about that.

Most of my BBW female friends date men of all sizes. I think some of them are attracted to bigger men, but actually I would say it’s about half and half. Once or twice, I’d get kind of a funny look when out with a “fit” guy. I guess it’s just part of dating someone who’s a different size than you. One time, I was at a dance with my date. I went to the bathroom and when I came back, there was a skinny girl in my chair. She just assumed that he wasn’t with me, obviously, because of my size. It was so disrespectful!

I don’t think men judge women for their looks any more than women judge men for the same reason. It goes both ways. I think most women have to get over their own insecurities and realize that there are plenty of men who find them attractive. There are those that don’t, and that’s fine. They don’t realize how much fun they are or how attractive they really are. Just because a man isn’t attracted to you doesn’t mean there aren’t other men who will be. You just need to find your niche!

2 Responses to What It’s Like To Be A BBW

  1. I love big lady’s as big lad my self but a hart of gold and I do agree what you say .so any way would you like to chat it would be nice to chat to a bbw xxxxx

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